Sadly though, there is another fear you need to be aware of, a fear that can be considered the evil twin of FOMO and that could be even more harmful. It is called FOBO, an acronym that is still Patrick McGinnis’ brainchild and that is short for Fear Of a Better Option [4]. To experience it, you must, by definition, have plenty of options, which is no big deal since, as previously mentioned, we live in a choice-rich world where even simple decisions, such as buying groceries, are fraught with overthinking and overanalysis.

The Internet and the massive success of e-commerce websites have further exacerbated this issue as, online, we are able to discover and access an endless number of different versions of any product or service. For instance, if you wanted to purchase a body sponge, you would have to scroll through thousands of items and look into hundreds of customers’ reviews, so an excessive amount of information just to buy such an ordinary object. Consequently, chances are you experience FOBO on a daily basis as, every single day, you need to make decisions that force you to choose one option out of a boundless group of perfectly acceptable alternatives.

The question, therefore, arises spontaneously: is having endless choices bad? Well, even though it may seem counterintuitive, since we are generally led to believe that being able to choose among many suitable options is a privilege, FOBO generates such extreme analysis paralysis that it can negatively affect every aspect of our life. Indeed, when you fail to make decisions rapidly and firmly, you waste precious time and energy that you could have devoted to other worthy activities.

Such claims might sound a bit pessimistic. However, luckily, it is possible to overcome FOBO. As perfectly explained by Patrick McGinnis himself in his How to make faster decisions TED Talk, the secret is to determine the stakes with any choice you have to make so that your decision-making process will be more informed and, above all, smoother. Notably, by adopting this approach, you will manage to effectively split any decision into three main categories:

• • No-stakes decisions
  • Low-stakes decisions
  • High-stakes decisions

No-stakes decisions

No-stakes decisions are those that, most of the time, do not have a wrong answer and, therefore, are easily forgotten within a few hours after making them. An example is deciding which movie to watch on Netflix. Obviously, with hundreds of movies available on the streaming platform, it is easy to get overwhelmed, yet no matter what you select, negative long-term effects are fundamentally nonexistent.

From this perspective, spending plenty of time deciding whether to watch The Wolf of Wall Street or Catch Me If You Can is pointless. But how to move on? Well, considering that, in these cases, the stakes are at their lowest, the best solution is to leave decisions up to chance [5]. For instance, you could simply flip a coin, assigning one of the options to heads and the other to tails. By doing so, you would not only get rapidly over your decision but also avoid blaming yourself if the elected movie is not to your liking.

Low-stakes decisions

Low-stakes decisions demand a bit of reasoning as they can lead to many different acceptable outcomes and have some sort of consequences on our lives, even if not dramatic ones. This category encompasses daily decisions in the office, such as purchasing laptops for employees working from home or booking a venue for a meeting, that is, decisions that, although requiring some thinking, will slip your mind in a matter of weeks as no one will get hurt if, with hindsight, it will turn out that you could have chosen a better option.

Therefore, when faced with these types of choices, you can still outsource your decision-making process. However, since a little bit of critical thinking is involved, it is wiser to count on another person rather than on chance [5]. For example, you could set out your alternatives and arguments to a trusted person and then accept their recommendation immediately, whatever it might be and without any second thought.

High-stakes decisions

High-stakes decisions are those that have a considerable long-term effect on our lives, such as enrolling in university or accepting a job. In other words, we are talking about decisions for which we do not want to make any mistakes as they carry significant risks.

For this reason, when facing such crossroads, it is crucial to establish some basic principles and concentrate on what truly matters to you [5]. Then, after setting out your decision-making framework and your objectives, you need to collect relevant facts about your options. This data gathering can simply result in a list of pros and cons, but, in order to avoid unnecessary second thoughts, it must be focused on your core values. For instance, if you are sensitive to issues like animal abuse, you will turn down a job from a cosmetics company renowned for testing products on animals and take into consideration job offers from cruelty-free organisations, even if it means missing out on a higher salary. Thereby, this decision-making method allows you to only contemplate alternatives that are already perfectly acceptable to you, meaning that any possible inconvenience or drawback will be limited.

Once you have defined your ground rules, the actual decision-making process can begin. It can be conceived as an elimination round as, to make it smoother, it is best to trigger it by selecting a front-runner option based on your instinct and then start comparing it with the other alternatives until you get down to one final choice [5]. The key to avoiding FOBO is to remember that whenever you get rid of an option, it is gone for good as, if you keep dwelling on what you have discarded, you will undoubtedly get stuck and end up never making a decision.

Once you have finally made your choice, the last thing to do is to commit as you will never know whether you have made the perfect decision, but you will undoubtedly feel more rewarded if you have put a lot of effort into reaching a certain aim. Furthermore, as Patrick McGinnis himself suggests, whenever we feel overwhelmed by the huge amount of choices we have to make daily, we should remember that many people in the world will never have to worry about FOMO or FOBO at all.

“Unlike the billions of people who have few options, if any, due to war, poverty or illness, you have plentiful opportunities to live decisively. You may not get everything you want, but the mere fact you get to decide is powerful. In fact, it’s a gift. Make the most of it.” [6]

If you enjoyed this, you should check out FOMO Sapiens, Patrick McGinnis’ podcast focused on the importance of making decisions firmly and finding the courage to miss out on the rest.

Moreover, I suggest the following TED Talks to learn more about how we choose.

• • How to make hard choices by Ruth Chang
  • The art of choosing & How to make choosing easier by Sheena Iyengar 
  • Our unhealthy obsession with choice by Renata Salecl

References

[1] https://www.ted.com/talks/barry_schwartz_the_paradox_of_choice

[2] https://thedecisionlab.com/reference-guide/economics/the-paradox-of-choice

[3] https://www-sciencedirect-com.uow.idm.oclc.org/science/article/pii/S0040162521003632

[4] https://patrickmcginnis.com/blog/meet-fobo-the-evil-brother-of-fomo-that-can-ruin-your-life/

[5] https://medium.com/illumination/this-is-what-happened-when-i-tried-to-break-free-from-fobo-a95f38d54355

[6] https://www.ted.com/talks/patrick_mcginnis_how_to_make_faster_decisions